Stroke It!
Perhaps my work ethic isn’t as above and beyond as I once thought, but for the life of me I cannot understand why a woman showed up to work today presenting every possible symptom of impending stroke ever listed in any “So You May Have a Droopy Left Side” pamphlet or stroke resource. Now, I have come into work while I was just inches from officially knocking at death’s door, and I’ve done the requisite hacking up of a lung when the boss asks me if I'm sick, but I don’t think work would be my first stop in the morning if I was seemingly inches away from a stroke.
In her defense she’s up for a big promotion, but I’m willing to wager my years salary that no one would be sitting around discussing who’s best for the job and say, “Oh, yea, but she missed work that one morning because she thought she might have a stroke.” and take her out of the running.
Either way, pulling up to four ambulances with flashing lights and sirens going is a great way to start the week, don’t you think?
Oh, and this guy is my new hero. I have $20 on him being sued the minute she finds the article.
In her defense she’s up for a big promotion, but I’m willing to wager my years salary that no one would be sitting around discussing who’s best for the job and say, “Oh, yea, but she missed work that one morning because she thought she might have a stroke.” and take her out of the running.
Either way, pulling up to four ambulances with flashing lights and sirens going is a great way to start the week, don’t you think?
Oh, and this guy is my new hero. I have $20 on him being sued the minute she finds the article.
Labels: shitballs
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7 People Who Bitched:
On the stroke front...not something I'd gut through. Although it'd make for great leverage when the time came for a raise.
On the article front...if there was a god, just ONCE when asked if someone would like to meet Paris, I'd love for the answer to just simply be no. No drama or anything, just no and then go back to what they were doing.
Oh and thanks for your comment on my last post-now if only I could duplicate your abs I'd be one happy fucking woman.
Good article. Paris is crazy...
I'd say I want to meet her, then ask her how it feels to be known for nothing more than being an elitist whore who is simply being used by every media outlet and product line out there for their own monetary gain.
I'd be fascinated to know what it likes to sell your soul to the devil and have nothing to even show for it but some money.
And she'd look at you with that dumb glazed expression and say...
that's hawt.
If you did get the chance to ask her that though, you might cause her brain to fry and for that we, as a society, would ♥ you forever.
LOL!
I'll do it! But, she has to have her vagina falling out while she's saying "That's Hot," or no deal. I have my standards!
I will not work with non-professionals!
Everyone says that they want to tell her off in person, but the reality is that most of them would get all giggly and then make out with her.
I'm pathologically turned off by blondes. Ain't happening.
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